Some people don’t believe answers can fall from the sky. They believe an answer should be studied, researched, and tried before practiced. I’m sure that’s how the Biblical Israelites felt when Moses was leading them through the desert and they were told they could thrive on manna from heaven. I’m sure even those who didn’t want to admit it were scared to death, thinking that there was no way they could live with such a simple answer to from where they would receive their nutrition. I wondered all weekend about from where would I find my answers. I didn’t have the energy to look for them, but plenty enough energy to complain.
The weekend started on a weird tone. One of the chickens decided she’d fly the coop while I was filling their water dish. It was Lucille, named for John’s granny, the same one that got away from us at the stock sale. She just took a notion to fly out, and it took awhile to get her to a place where we could pick her up and put her back in. Then, my camera decided to die. Just when I was getting the hang of taking some decent pictures to add to the posts on this blog, my camera takes a notion to give up its service to me.
I read a post earlier in the weekend about relaxing in one of my favorite blogs called The Breeder Files. She is such an inspiring and honest person. Inspired by her writing, I tried to remember my blessings in the areas of chicken tending and digital cameras. I’m consistently getting three eggs a day from my hens now, which means I’m doing a great job taking care of them. My free rooster sits on the back porch and crows for me to come out to see him much like my ten year old Dalmatian does when he sits at the door and whines for me. Sometimes they are out there together. I’m loved! 🙂 As far as the camera, I’ve had it for around four years. I have received many comments about the pictures on this blog despite the fact that I never thought the camera took good pictures. A hobby photographer, Amy, who blogs at Blessed With Three, said she liked my pictures of the aquarium I recently posted. I love her photography. It is beautiful art, so that was a nice thing to read. I got my some worth out of that camera. Man made things, though we try, can’t last forever. (Any recommendations on a camera I might find on ebay?)
Then, I decided to do some complaining with a group of writer mamas I talk with online. I asked how they reconcile their responsibilities to their creative time. I didn’t get to complain long before a woman recommended I vow to do a blog post a day and one hour of novel work. I wanted to knock myself over the head… duh. I already get a blog post 5 days a week which meets my goal. I can manage one hour of novel writing most days. I need to decide to be satisfied with that. Writing, right now, is a part time endeavor. Motherhood is my job and my duty. I can find fulfillment where ever I decide to look for it. Another woman told me to write down everything that I was able to accomplish in a day, instead of focusing on what I didn’t get done. She said I might be surprised. I’m going to try that.
After doing these things, I made the decision to be easier on myself this weekend. Deladis went with John’s mother, I got to read my work at a literary reading where Gurney Norman read from a new selection of Wilgus stories he is working on, and I followed Ivy around the Seedtime on the Cumberland festival, letting her dictate where we went next. It was good for me. I had to relinquish control. I had to give a little.
At Seedtime I got to talk with a friendly acquaintance that we hadn’t seen in quite sometime. He was showing a version of a film he has been working on for three years. He said in that time he moved, built a home, started a new job, got married, and had a baby. The film had to wait for these things. He said the idea for the documentary didn’t go anywhere. It rested in his mind until he had the chance to work, and he found it evolved. Then, he would ease back into it, and eventually it would flow like he had never stopped. I needed to hear those words so bad. My writing accomplishments won’t come all at once. Some can wait. Some should wait.
Then, I get home and check my email. I opened my email subscription to The Nourished Kitchen to find Jenny had included me in a list of seven bloggers whose blogs she values for their information and good reading! I was taken aback by that and overwhelmed with joy. She is so successful with her blog, and I love her posts. Her site is a wealth of information for anyone who is trying to be mindful about food. I aspire to her success. I was rewarded by someone valuing the time I spend with this blog.
I got these answers. They fell from the sky. I found them in places I wouldn’t have thought to look. I found them when I wasn’t looking. When I was doing nothing but feeling sorry for myself and complaining. When I didn’t deserve an answer one. Blessing are all around us. Sometimes I think we are too swept up by the pitfalls in life and blinded by the everyday that it makes it easy not to care so much about the good things when our energy is wasted worrying about the bad.
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June 16, 2009 at 1:14 am
Annita
I should print this off and tape it to the front of the fridge…I just may do that. Thanks for such an uplifting and positive post, very helpful for a fellow writing mama struggling with a similar dilemma!
June 16, 2009 at 3:31 pm
Fun Mama - Deanna
That’s a great idea to make a goal for your writing and be satisfied with that. I’m no where close to writing a post a day, or writing an hour a day, but that doesn’t mean I can’t do something. Thanks for this post!
June 16, 2009 at 4:26 pm
Amy
Wonderful post!
What price range are you looking at for the camera? You really can’t go wrong with a Canon. The powershots are nice cameras (Those retail from around $120 up to 250-ish).
June 16, 2009 at 7:20 pm
lesleehorner
So I just emailed a copy of my novel to a friend today. After reading the beginning she wrote back saying she would do some editing for me. I know it needs more work, but I am so tired. I love the book so much and want to see it come to fruition someday. In order for that to happen the work must be done. I was just thinking of how and when I will get to it, especially now that I am blogging and trying to write at least one post a day. Like you say, the answers come, and for me they came in the form of reading your blog today. I think I want to do what that mommy friend you mentioned is doing and commit to writing 1 blog post and devoting 1 hour to novel work. This is totally doable and doesn’t make me feel overwhelmed.
I have commented before that you and I have some things in common. Reading this posts reminds me of that. I am not alone in my struggle between being a mommy and a writer. These little reminders along the way let me know I’m heading in the right direction! Thank you!
June 17, 2009 at 12:38 am
Marge Fulton
Manna from Heaven. We receive God’s grace like that. I think that creative people struggle with balance in our lives. We feel that conflict between muse and responsibilities. You are juggling things but seem to cover all the bases. Keep up the good work! Three eggs a day sounds perfect!
June 17, 2009 at 12:47 am
breedermama
Just out of curiosity, when the chicken flew the coop did you find yourself singing, “You picked a fine time to leave me Lucille…..” 🙂
I am overjoyed that you found something helpful from my post! We inspire each other and lucky we are for that.
My camera recently died too (baby + camera + concrete = 😦 ), I replaced it with a Nikon Coolpix that was on sale at best buy for $119 and I think it still is. I hope you can get a replacement. I love seeing the hills and your beautiful girls’ faces.